The wedding guest hall of shame: what film's worst-dressed guests teach the rest of us

Film has been dressing men badly for formal occasions for as long as there have been films, which turns out to be useful. Each character below makes a mistake that real guests worry about in the week before a wedding. All of them are fictional; the questions are real. Here they are, with affection, and the fix each one needed.

1. Is a tuxedo too much for a daytime wedding?

The Godfather (1972) opens on Vito Corleone’s daughter’s wedding, a big outdoor party in the afternoon sun, while the Don receives visitors indoors in a black three-piece dinner suit with a flower in his lapel.

Usually, yes, it is too much. A dinner suit is evening dress. At a cocktail or afternoon wedding it sits two levels above the dress code and puts a guest in competition with the wedding party.

The fix: a dark suit by day, and a dinner suit only when the invitation says black tie. Vito gets a pass. He is the father of the bride, it is his party, and nobody was going to tell him.

2. Is a pink suit too much as a wedding guest?

In Fitzgerald’s novel, Tom Buchanan holds up Gatsby’s pink suit as proof that he is not the Oxford man he claims to be. The suit gets talked about before the man does.

At someone else’s wedding, standing out is the wedding party’s job. A pale suit is right at a summer daytime wedding outdoors, provided everything around it stays quiet.

The fix: start with stone, tan or a pale grey, which do the summer job without starting a conversation, and save the pink for an occasion that is yours. The Gatsby suit, and how to wear a pale one.

3. How do I wear something with personality without upstaging anyone?

In Four Weddings and a Funeral (1994), Gareth booms through the receptions in waistcoats louder than the band. His instinct is sound: the colour is in one place, and the rest of him is a plain suit.

The fix: one piece with character (a waistcoat, a tie, a pocket square) on a plain navy or grey suit. A guest who wants colour should start here before he considers a coloured suit. The pocket square is the quietest version.

4. Do I need all the frills for black tie?

In Dumb and Dumber (1994), Harry and Lloyd arrive at a black-tie charity gala in Aspen in a powder-blue tuxedo and an orange one, with ruffled shirts, matching top hats and canes. They believe they are the best-dressed men in the room. The orange tuxedo, taken apart.

No. Black tie is a short list: a black or midnight dinner suit with silk on the lapels, a white dress shirt, a black bow tie and black shoes. Studs only if the shirt has stud holes. The top hat belongs to white tie and morning dress, which makes it the funniest mistake in the scene.

The fix: the list above, done properly. If you rent the dinner suit (the case both ways is here), consider owning the shirt. Rental shirts draw their own complaints (scratchy cloth, a collar sized to the nearest half inch), and the shirt is against your neck all night. You should be able to slide a finger inside the buttoned collar; custom shirts settle that once.

5. Can I wear my black suit to a black-tie wedding?

The Blues Brothers (1980) wear the same thing everywhere: black suits, narrow black ties, white shirts, hats and dark glasses.

At strict black tie, a black suit still reads as a suit. It has no silk on the lapels and no braid on the trousers, and beside a room of dinner jackets the difference is obvious. At an ordinary wedding a black suit is fine, though in black and white it can sit uncomfortably close to the staff. Black tie, decoded.

The fix: a dinner suit when the invitation says black tie. If you want one suit for weddings, funerals and interviews, charcoal or navy does all three with more life in photographs. Whatever the colour, choose a matte wool; a cloth that shines under the dance-floor lights photographs like a mirror. How to read a suit’s quality in 30 seconds.

6. Should I size up to hide my stomach?

In The Mask (1994), the green-faced hero dances in a canary-yellow zoot suit: a long jacket, huge shoulders, and high-waisted trousers with yards of cloth in the leg. It is sizing up taken all the way, and it shows the problem: extra cloth everywhere makes a man look bigger everywhere.

The fix: fit the shoulders, which set the size of the whole jacket, and let the trousers do the work for the stomach. A higher rise sits above the belly instead of under it, so no triangle of shirt shows below the jacket button. Trousers for a bigger belly.

7. Will my old suit, or my brother’s, still do?

In Tommy Boy (1995), Tommy puts on his friend Richard’s jacket, sings about being a fat guy in a little coat, and splits it down the back. Why jackets split down the back.

Buttoning in the bedroom mirror proves very little. Button it, then reach forward as if to hug someone. If the sleeves climb halfway up your forearm, creases pull in an X from the button, or you can feel the back across your shoulder blades, it will pull in every photograph.

The fix: many good suits can be let out; some cannot. Bring it in while there is time to find out which yours is. When to alter, when to replace.

Will I cook in black tie at a summer wedding?

The one man on screen who gets it right. In Casablanca (1942), Rick runs a nightclub in a hot city and wears an ivory dinner jacket with black trousers and a black bow tie. That is warm-weather black tie, correct in the heat, always with black trousers and never white ones. Rick’s jacket, and when to wear one.

Before the next invitation arrives, put on the suit you plan to wear, sit down, reach forward, and check your back in a second mirror. If anything pulls, bring it to alterations while there are weeks to spare; if there is nothing in the wardrobe to try on, book a time. For a whole party, start with what your groomsmen actually want to wear.